December 26, 2010 - Christmas miracle!

Background - I’m going out of order because this one totally blew me away!! I’m still saying “you’ve got to be kidding me! (YGTBKM). Also, to say it’s a Christmas miracle is a bit of an over-statement, but I needed to get your attention (shameless, I know). Let’s just say it was a small gift from God, the universe and the “powers that be”!!

Two weeks ago, I bought my oldest sister a beautiful sparkly cream scarf from Macy’s for Christmas, and added to the purchase the same scarf in red and black for myself! It didn’t take 24 hours for me to start feeling guilty about the “one gift for others, two gifts for me” pattern I had developed and I promptly returned the black scarf to Macy’s. I was fighting with myself the entire way because I wanted that scarf so badly, but in the end my overburdened conscience won out and the scarf went back.

S.C.O.U.T. - Christmas day my younger sister began passing her gifts around and my oldest sister opened hers first. What she found in the package was the very same sparkly red scarf I had bought for myself and the identical style to the sparkly cream one I just gave her! How uncanny for us to have bought the exact same scarves. I mean really, think about all the scarves out there and the odds of us picking the exact same ones! Tingle, tingle. I started getting that funny feeling that this was turning into a S.C.O.U.T.
My other sister opened her gift to find that she had received the same sparkly red scarf (these are really cute scarves). I then realized that my little sister had gotten us all the same thing and that the gift I was holding most likely contained this same red scarf. I would now have two of the same red scarf (punishment no doubt for settling on the "one gift for others, one gift for myself" pattern).

I began telling my little sister the story as I tore open the paper. I popped open the box and there was the black scarf that I had returned two weeks ago and wanted so badly. I was stunned! I stammered as the strangeness of this timing settled in on me and asked her why she had gotten me the black instead of the red and she told me, and I quote,

“I don’t know why I got you the black one instead of the red one. I was going to get you the red and at the last second I just had the thought that you might like the black one better. It was kinda weird!”

Wow! I want to thank God, the universe and the “powers that be” for both the scarf (!) and this terrific Strange Case of Uncanny Timing to post on my blog!  My goofy dog Scout is still recovering from one too many celebration cookies, but told me to tell you Merry Christmas and happy holidays to all!

Reader Contribution - "Prolate Spheroid" fantasy fulfilled!

November 6, 2010, Zack told me  - that during his high school football game he was getting frustrated because he was never able to catch the football that the boosters threw into the stands to keep the fans entertained during lulls in the game. He’d wanted to catch that thing for some time now and even expressed his frustration to the friend sitting next to him “I never get the ball. I want to catch that thing so bad, but it never comes to me. If it just come a little closer I know I could get it.”


S.C.O.U.T.  - Zack had barely finished his rant about missing out on the awesome experience of catching the ball, when moments later the football came drilling into the stands once again. This time the spinning oval projectile knew exactly where it was headed and made a bee line straight for Zack’s waiting arms! It was as if the ball, or someone, or something had heard his request and proceeded to fulfill his football catching fantasy.

Zack couldn’t have been more thrilled to be clutching the cold, bumpy red leather trophy until the students around him realized that the prize was within their reach as well. All they had to do was to dive on the owner, crush him to the ground, pound him in the back of the head and pry the ball from his unsuspecting grip, which is exactly what they did.

Zack lost the ball and a bit of his pride, but no one could take the thrill of the catch from him. He went home with a smile on his face, and a few bumps and bruises to help him remember the glory. He’s satisfied now, fantasy fulfilled, and has made it clear to “the powers that be” that once is enough, no more football glory required. Could it be that he’s learned the very important lesson of “be careful what you wish for!” The lumps on his noggin say “yes“!

P.S. “Prolate Spheroid” is the scientific name for any object that’s shaped like a football. See, you learn something new everyday!

May 8, 2010 - Social angst resolved, and a great parking space to boot!

Background - I’m socially awkward. Actually that’s being kind, I’m a social moron and I’m so bad at remembering peoples names that I’ve developed an entire coping system to never have to say a name unless I know the person super well. “Hey buddy“, “Hello darlin”, or “Hey there“ and “How are YOU?” (with the emphasis on you) are devised to sound like I know your name so well I don’t even have to use it. I know its pathetic, but I’ve learned to accept this character flaw and even live with it.
Live with it that is, until I’m faced with yet another social test. I agreed to meet a group of woman that I don’t know very well for happy hour at a local restaurant and had worked myself into a frenzy on the way to the gathering. I’d convinced myself that, not only would I not remember their names, but I wouldn’t even recognize their faces in the restaurant. I would walk right past their table as they stared at me wondering “what the hell is she doing?” and then the obvious follow-up question, “what the hell is wrong with her?”. My secret would be out. “She’s a social moron“ they would say. I almost considered turning the car around with the thought of it, but stopped myself mid-panic. “Hold it together Guen. Don’t be ridiculous. Its going to be fine. Your going to go into that restaurant, find these nice ladies and have a laugh. Seriously, would you grow up please” I chastised myself.

S.C.O.U.T. - I had just finished calming myself and picturing the entire evening going smooth as silk when my cell phone rang. I pulled into a parking lot to take the call. “Hey Guen, its Lauren, we’re at the third table on the left after you pass the hostess stand. Just wanted you to know which table we’re at when you get here”. My first thought was “you’ve got to be kidding me! That‘s just what I needed to know in order to avoid my usual embarrassing calamity!” and my second thought was “congratulations! At least you had HER name right”.

What a strange case of uncanny timing. Sweet! Social angst resolved I thought, while taking a moment to note the awesome timing of that phone call…ask and ye shall receive!

I pulled into the restaurant behind four other cars only to find every single space in the lot filled. Peeling off early from the pack, I figured that I had no choice but to park in the over-flow lot and walk. As I began down the main aisle, I decided there was nothing to lose by playing a few rounds of “the parking space game“. Creeping down the aisle I repeated to my empty car “ I will find a good space. I will find a good space. I will find a good space and not have to walk from the dark, spooky over flow lot”.
I reached the very end of the aisle and my eyes settled on the only open spot in the sea of parked cars. It was the first space in the aisle, and one of the closest spaces to the front door…must be a handicapped spot. I squinted to find the wheelchair sign, but quickly realized there wasn’t one. Unbelievable!! You’ve got to be kidding me!! The other four cars went trundling past me headed for the over-flow parking as I sat laughing my ass off. What a truly uncanny case of timing this night was turning into!! Where’s that goofy dog of mine?!!