June 16, 2010 - Webster's dictionary is in Jeopardy

Background - Two days ago I was riding in the car with my husband and I used the word “irregardless”.  It bugged me because I was pretty sure that this isn’t a word and it had always bothered me when someone used it because I would think “that’s not a word”.  I was pretty sure the correct word is “regardless” and yet here I had used the word “irregardless” and it felt right.  “Hmmm?” I thought, “I need to find out once and for all which word is the correct one because it would bug me if I‘m using it incorrectly“.  I filed it away in the “check it out when I have a minute” file and moved on.

S.C.O.U.T. - That very same night we sat down to watch Jeopardy.  During the second round, in the category “Confuse - U”, the $1,000 question was about the word “irregardless”.  The answer was drop the “IR”, irregardless is not a word.  The word is regardless.

I was stunned.  If only I could get the answers to all my questions this quickly and this clearly!!  For instance, I’m still wondering what the winning lottery #”s for Friday are….!

My goofy dog Scout says he has all the answers he needs.  The cookies are on the counter and dinner is at 4pm.  Ahhh, the simple life.

Reader contribution - A fainting goat named S.C.O.U.T.

Background - Caroline told me the story of her daughter watching “America’s Funniest Home Videos” and the clip she had seen of the goat that seems to “faint” when startled or excited.  Her daughter couldn’t stop replaying the clip and giggling herself silly!   She even replayed it for her Mom and Dad to let them in on the fun.  “What an odd goat” they all thought, never having seen anything like it.  Her daughter finally got enough and they all went on their merry way, not thinking another thing about it. 

S.C.O.U.T. - The next day her daughter comes home from school and answers the question that had been swirling around the goat video from the day before… “What’s wrong with that goat?”  That day, Caroline’s daughter learned about the “Tennessee fainting goat” at school.  This goat is a particular breed of goat that inherits a gene for a disorder called “Mystonia Congenita” which causes their muscles, and specifically their legs, to “stiffen” when startled or excited.  The goats often tip over from the effects and appear to “faint”.  After about 10 seconds they return to normal and trot off as if nothing happened.

We named this goat S.C.O.U.T. because we are having trouble believing that, after seeing this breed of goat for the very first time; Caroline’s daughter coincidently learns about it in class the very next day and answers the question “what’s wrong with that goat?”  Uncanny!!

Caroline’s husband noted that the goat isn’t nearly as funny now that we know what’s wrong with it.  My goofy dog Scout agrees with Caroline’s husband and is also annoyed that somewhere out there, his namesake is a goat. 

June 15, 2010 - Blood brothers? No, blood sisters!

Background -  It was 8:30 in the morning and I arrive at my doctors office to get my blood drawn a week in advance of my physical. Before entering the building, I see a white van that looks just like my sisters car and get a tingle down my spine. I have the feeling that I’m going to see her in the waiting room. She goes to the same doctor, but I haven’t seen, or even talked to her in at least a month or so, and therefore have no idea when she may be seeing the doctor. I walk into the waiting room and … she’s not there. I shake off the prickly feeling that I was going to see her and go on with my appointment. When I’m done, I call her just to say hi, see what she’s up to and tell her that I had been thinking about her.

S.C.O.U.T.-  She answers her cell phone and promptly tells me that she’s on her way over to our doctors office to get her annual physical and her blood work done!! Her appointment is at 9:30. I missed her by 10 minutes. Come on! YGTBKM (you’ve got to be kidding me).

My goofy dog Scout is completely, and utterly silent on this one.

June 10, 2010 - Vegetarians hate meat

Background  -  I had just picked my youngest son up from McDonalds and his friends were on the sidewalk as we drove out of the shopping center. I pointed out one friend who we hadn’t seen for awhile, and asked my son if he knew what this kid had been up to lately. He said that he had found out that this kid had become a vegetarian since we last saw him. This kid is only in seventh grade and I said that I thought that was pretty cool for a seventh grader. I told my son that there is certainly nothing wrong with becoming a vegetarian at his age, but that this kid is the last one I ever thought would become a vegetarian at all! I told him that I thought it was interesting and showed a certain character and discipline to do that. My son agreed and the short conversation came to an end.

S.C.O.U.T. -  We sat quietly for no more than ten seconds when a car passed me and then changed lanes in front of us. The license plate on the car read “H8MEAT”! My son and I just looked at one another to make sure we hadn’t dreamed it. Nope. We had both seen it! What truly uncanny timing that we should see that license plate at that moment.

My goofy dog Scout believes himself to also be a vegetarian. I don’t have the heart to tell him